I want to leave. ‘What the fuck?’ I say. He looks at me. ‘I was walking down the street and there you were, sitting down eating with Anna. I couldn’t believe it. I’ve wanted to call you for months, but I didn’t know how or what to say. I saw you sitting there and I couldn’t stop myself, I had to talk to you.’ For the first time I stop crying. ‘You make me sick,’ I say and I turn and go down the subway stairs. He doesn’t follow. . .. I call work and tell them I’m not feeling well and that I’m not coming back for the day. They ask if I’m okay and I say that I’m fine, I just have a bad headache and need to lie down. I get a sincere ‘Feel better’ and hang up. I’m sitting on the couch, facing my window view of the city in my apartment when I hear a key in the door. It opens, and I turn to see Jon walking in, flowers in his hand. ‘I know you don’t like flowers,’ his deep voice says as he moves closer to me, ‘but chocolate is bad for headaches.’ He smiles and bends down to kiss me on the. Much like animals in the wild, humans can’t be monogamous. We’re all sexual beings. We all want to have sex. If there were no rules, no boundaries, and nothing to conform to and adhere to, we’d all be swingers. If these were our last days on Earth, fuck marriage, except for Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt and Kanye West and Kim Kardashian, who truly love one another, yeah, right, we’d all be fucking and sucking one another. Just as her non-swinging friends would be aghast if they knew she was a swinger, she was aghast that they played the role of a faithful wife while pretending to be happily married. If they were all so happy being married, then why do they lust over Ryan Reynolds, Mr. McDreamy, and other celebrities on television and at the movies. If they were happy being married, then why do they masturbate themselves while thinking of the lawn care men, the pizza delivery man, the UPS and Fedex men, and construction workers they see on the street? Liz imagined it unbearably.
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